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football, gruden, jon gruden, mnf, monday night football, nfl, quotes, spider 2 y banana, week 9
The Jon Gruden Quote of the Week: “This Andrew Luck, he’s an architectural man, Mike. He’s interested in STADIUMS. He told me the components that comprise concrete.”
Hello everyone! Just want to quickly apologize for the day late update, it’s happened twice now this season – burn me at the stake! However, we are here now, and we have a good week lined up for you as the Spider 2 Y Banana makes a brief return. Enjoy!
Week 9 – November 5, 2014
1. “Cleveland rocks.”
2. “Might as well have called Spider 2 Y Banana, Mike.”
3. “If you don’t gain anything on 1st down, it’s almost like a sack.”
4. “These are professional bump and run specialists.”
5. “It’s really important for Eli Manning to score points tonight.”
6. “They’ve got to give him a hand, help him get off, give him some relief.” (…)
7. “Vontae Davis, he might be the Grinder tonight.”
8. “It’s hard to tell what’s going on in this league. How about the Colts? They gave up 650 yards last week; they look like the ’75 Steelers tonight.”
9. “Odell Beckham Jr. I like it…this man is EXTREMELY FAST. He brings a quality that the Giants have never had, SPEED.”
10. “Eli Manning has to learn a lot of his new teammate’s names. He’s also gotta learn a lot of new fundamentals. That’s like teaching Tiger Woods how to old a club or teaching LeBron James how to shoot.” (I don’t think so.)
11. “I don’t know how many attempts Luck has, but I guarantee you he’s on pace to overtake Matthew Stafford for the NFL record in attempts.”
12. “He kicked me out of Oakland. I disliked Adam Vinatieri for a long time. He’s something else.”
13. “I don’t know about fifteen yards. Can’t we give them a break of some kind?” (after a facemask penalty.)
14. “Andrew Luck. A human SHREDDER.”
15. “Vontae Davis looks like Bumgarner from the Giants. He’s throwing a no hitter out there tonight.”
16. “Andrew Luck only comes along every five or ten or twenty years. Or a lifetime.”
17. “That’s one of the all-time great plays you’ll ever see Andrew Luck or any other quarterback make, EVER.” (after an Andrew Luck TD pass to Reggie Wayne.)
18. “This Andrew Luck, he’s an architectural man, Mike. He’s interested in STADIUMS. He told me the components that comprise concrete.” (Week 9 Quote of the Week!)
Weekly Dose of Phil Simms – Broncos @ Patriots:
Remember, these are a punishment, not a reward – and are not meant to entertain.
1. “It is. This is definitely a riveally.” (Rivalry?)
2. “Jim, we’d just seened Brandon LaFell come acrost.” (Sounds worse than my Kindergarten students.)
3. “When you get a chance to score points in this game, you do it.” (Captain Obvious checking in.)
4. “Jim, the tackling has been Chris.”
5. “You can’t talk about him enough because we talking about Vonn Miller.”
6. “They (Patriots) do that a lot. They have a guy look around and throw in the back of the end zone.” (what…)
7. “That was a different league back then (2004), you could hit the receivers.”
8. “Stopping progress, you name it. It’s there in the rulebook.”
9. “Ninkovich, he’s a…whats the word for it…a pain.” (He actually struggled for this.)
10. “They have a game plan for every game. They don’t say ‘hey, let’s just go in and run our stuff.'”
Honorary Mentions from Other Announcers:
1. “It’s like a herd of Zebras!” -Dan Fouts (on the referees) (SD vs. MIA)
2. “As always with Kansas City, the key today will be defense, the running game, and if Andy Reid can protect a lead until the seventh inning.” -Sam Mellinger (NYJ vs. KC)
3. “After tonight, we’re done with the NFC South. We already had the blockbuster Atlanta-Tampa game.” -Jim Nantz (NO vs. CAR)
4. “Brandon Weeden is a first round talent.” -Troy Aikman (AZ vs. DAL)
5. “And he’s gonna kick it away to Ted Ginn Jr…it’d be really weird if he kicked it away to Ted Ginn Sr.” -Joe Buck (AZ vs. DAL)
6. “That’s what Carson Palmer loves about this offense. False start, Arizona.” -Joe Buck (AZ vs. DAL)
7. “That’s just a very decisive decision.” -Daryl Johnston (PHI vs. HOU)
8. “J.J. Watt wouldn’t even have a cake ball.” -Daryl Johnston (PHI vs. HOU)
9. “He’s got that make-guys-missability.” -Ronde Barber (WAS vs. MIN)
10. John Lynch: “Roberson makes the cardinal sin of getting his eyes in the backfield instead of having his man. Keep your eyes on your luggage, young man. Anquan Boldin takes advantage of it.”
Kevin Burkhardt: “His luggage just got taken to the house!” (STL vs. SF)
11. “If you’re in the Patriots locker room at half time, what do you think you have to do to get back in this game?” -Jim Nantz (score was 27-7 NE) (DEN vs. NE)
12. “This could impact this depending on what happens.” -Chris Collinsworth (BAL vs. PIT)
13. “So on a wing and a prayer….I’m sorry, I didn’t just say that.” -Al Michaels (BAL vs. PIT)
14. “The Ravens are taking a time out here. For some reason. I have no idea.” -Al Michaels (This was when the ravens were behind by like 22 points with a minute left. I have to agree with him here, but still hilarious.) (BAL vs. PIT)
15. “We welcome you into the booth for the awkward shot of two guys in suits talking into the camera.” -Joe Buck (AZ vs. DAL)
16. “Ajirotutu has been…Ajiro-jected” -Ian Eagle (YEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAHHH!) (PHI vs. HOU)
17. “James Harrison is the AARP player of the week.” -Al Michaels (BAL vs. PIT)
Thank you all for being patient on my day late update, see you next week – on time! Please share and help us grow!